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Giving Feedback Without Being the Bad Guy

Giving Feedback Without Being the Bad Guy - constructive feedback
Law firm owners manage roughly 1.3 million employees worldwide.

Law firm owners often struggle with giving feedback to their employees, as they want to help them improve without causing distress or hurt. The phrase “if you can’t say anything nice, don’t say anything at all” can make it uncomfortable to give feedback. However, feedback is essential for growth and improvement, and it’s defined by Google dictionary as “information about reactions to a product, a person’s performance, task, etc., which is used as a basis for improvement.”

The traditional approach to feedback is the “compliment sandwich” method, where a manager gives praise, followed by criticism, and then more praise. However, this method can be ineffective, as people may learn to disregard the praise or only hear the compliments. It can also break the trust between manager and employee.

Conventional Feedback vs. Observational Feedback

Observational feedback is a more collaborative approach, where the manager and employee work together to identify issues and determine solutions. This approach reinforces the idea that each team member is responsible for the firm’s success and helps to build trust and respect.

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Observational feedback is defined as an opportunity to assess or reassess a behavior, practice, or system to determine if it’s effective or needs change. It’s more effective than conventional feedback because it involves the employee in the process and helps them understand the issue and the solution.

Giving Feedback: When, Where, and How

The best time to give feedback is as soon as possible, while the details are still fresh in your mind. It’s essential to give feedback in private, rather than in a meeting or casually around the office, to avoid damaging your relationship with the employee and distracting others.

The best place to give feedback is in a private setting, such as your office, or even during a walk if the weather permits. Being authentic, direct, and clear is important when giving observational feedback. It’s essential to create a safe and non-judgmental space for the employee to share their thoughts and feelings.

To give observational feedback, you should introduce the topic and goal of the meeting, share your feelings and inquire about the employee’s feelings, and then discuss the issue and potential solutions. Using a preamble, such as “I’m giving you these comments because I have very high expectations and I know you can reach them,” can help set a positive tone for the conversation.

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Steps for Giving Observational Feedback

Prepare yourself to give feedback by acknowledging your emotions and accepting that it’s okay to feel nervous or anxious. Introduce the topic and goal of the meeting, and then share your feelings and ask the employee about theirs. Use a simple phrase, such as “I’m feeling a little nervous, I want this to go well, how about you?” to break the tension and create a safe space for discussion.

Share what you’ve noticed that caused you to want to give feedback, but do it as a question, asking the employee to share their perspective. Be specific, use examples, and work together to find a solution. This approach helps to create trust, loyalty, and accountability in your working relationship.

It’s a mindset shift to think of feedback as something you do to start something new and good, rather than something you do to stop something bad. People need connection and clarity to do their best work, and using observational feedback can improve performance, strengthen your law firm, and save your nerves.

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In practice, this means that law firm owners can use observational feedback to help their employees grow and develop, while also building trust and respect. By focusing on specific behaviors or practices that need improvement, rather than making general criticisms, law firm owners can create a positive and supportive work environment. This, in turn, can lead to improved performance, increased job satisfaction, and better outcomes for the firm as a whole.

Ultimately, giving good feedback is about creating a safe and supportive space for employees to learn and grow. By using observational feedback and focusing on specific behaviors or practices, law firm owners can help their employees develop the skills and knowledge they need to succeed, while also building a positive and productive work environment.

Law firm owners who use observational feedback can see significant improvements in their employees’ performance and overall job satisfaction. They can also build stronger relationships with their employees, which can lead to increased loyalty and retention. By making observational feedback a regular part of their management practice, law firm owners can create a more positive and productive work environment, which can have a direct impact on the firm’s success.

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